Lately, I’ve been thinking about friendship. My Russian peers seem to consider relationships differently than Americans. When asking fellow Russians to guess how many friends they have, the numbers were significantly lower than those of my American counterparts. I asked them to explain how their friendships form and, more importantly, what friendship meant to them. Through these conversations, Russian people seem to be more concerned with trust and “soul connections” above all. The concept of trust is a recurring theme among Russians. The Russian emphasis of trust seems to be on-par with the American emphasis of social image. The Americans I talked with mentioned popularity and casual friendship to varying levels, while my Russian counterparts placed value on close-knit relationships. Close-knit relationships are harder to come by as they require levels of trust. This could explain the smaller social circles that are found among Russian people. A Russian is more likely to smile at a friend rather than a stranger. As my friend Lilya explained, this is a result of “knowing” the friend, so one feels more comfortable to let their guard down around them. To her, a friend is more likely to arouse feelings of joy and make her smile than a stranger would. An American friend claimed the opposite. He felt more compelled to smile at a stranger to make “a good first impression” and would have less reason to practice the same politeness with a close friend.

(March 9, 2024)

Grins Across Borders: The Cultural Mysteries of Smiling

America vs Russia

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America vs Russia |

I’ve always been struck by how much Americans smile by comparison to Russians. This difference physically diversifies the people. Through a recent project, I found that these norms go deeper than initially meets the eye. I collected my findings through research and interviews.

“Smiling is a complex social phenomenon which can be explained from different angles, in relation to political systems, economic conditions, well-being, self-preservation strategies, and, last but not least, as nonverbal behavior guided by specific cultural scripts. ”

— Szarota 2010: 254

The simplicity of a smile belies its ability to transform social interaction. Smiling can be an expression of warmth and joy, exchanged and received freely. It can also be reserved for specific company and signify a range of emotions. Some cultures values open displays of emotion, while others do not.

Researcher Olya Kavgic finds that Eastern European smiling patterns reveal the speaker’s true intentions to the detriment of the hearer’s negative face, whereas American culture aims to protect the listener’s face through indirectness. Caldara explains how Westerners instead focus on the mouth to interpret facial signals. This is consistent with what my Russian Grandmother told me growing up, to “smile with my eyes.” To Arapova, the American smile is mostly “broad” and “showing teeth” which “looks more like a grin to Russians and would be considered as artificial and insincere.”

“Easterners are more attuned to fake and genuine smiles, as they concentrate (and perhaps develop a particular expertise for) their fixations on the eyes only. ”

— Caldara 2010: 438

“When sharing a glance with strangers in the streets, in transport and other places Americans usually smile and/or say something.”

— Sternin 2001: 101

Conversely, Americans encourage toothy smiles. “Say cheese” is a common phrase when getting your picture taken because it forces an open-mouthed smile. Braces are encouraged in adolescence. The smile is an indispensable part of conversation in America. Researcher Goffman theorized the face to be the public self-image of a person. He related one’s style of interaction and expression to social status. His idea of having a constant audience in public requires careful facial expression.

Russians idealize humility, trust, philosophy, intimate connections, blunt authenticity, and internal emotional fulfillment. This gives a Russian less incentive to smile casually at a stranger, unless given proper reason to.

When I interviewed my peers, I started with asking them whether or not they felt a need to smile at strangers and why. The Russians I talked with related smiling to emotion rather than etiquette. When I asked the American participants, the resounding answer was that the need to smile around strangers is felt as a part of social etiquette.

Americans are more influenced by social performance, reputation, future aspirations, success, optimism and self-improvement than Russians. This creates the compulsion to project an image of friendliness, through frequent smiling, with a desired outcome of popularity.

This claim of American indirectness versus Russian directness was reflected in my interview-driven conversations. Because these conversations were heavier, the speaker’s faces as well as my own were more serious in demeanor. The more intense topics of conversation reflect this Russian directness through both verbal and facial expression.
Similar topics were touched on with both parties, though the route that these conversations took was less intimate with my American counterparts. I found that I had to warm up to deeper topics, whereas with the Russians deep conversation came naturally.
Lighter, more passive conversational topics were observed with the American participants which entailed more smiling as a result.

“Smiling’s a good look on anyone. It’ll make you look more approachable and kind.”

— American interviewee #3

VS

“Someone who smiles a lot is thoughtless. It is silly to smile at everyone and everything, it is probably just a happy idiot.”

— Russian interviewee #1

The themes of success and future in connection to social reputation played a big role in my discoveries of American culture, while themes of directness, reflection and trust seemed to dominate the Russian sphere. Through my findings I was able to better understand myself, through the lenses of the two cultures that have shaped me. We are desensitized to smiles because we see them everyday. But, smiles are a key to understanding ourselves and those around us.

References

Arapova, Maria A. (2016): Cultural differences in Russian and Western smiling, Russian Journal of Communication, DOI. Lomonosov Moscow State University, Moscow, Russia.

Caldara, R. (2010). Beyond smiles: The impact of culture and race in embodying and decoding facial expressions. Behavioral and Brain Sciences. DOI.

Goﬀman 1967: E. Goﬀman, Interaction Ritual: Essays on Face to Face Behaviour, DOI. New York: Anchor.

Kavgic, Olga. (2021). INFLUENCE OF DIRECTNESS AND INDIRECTNESS ON VERBAL POLITENESS AND POLITIC BEHAVIOUR IN SUBTITLED TRANSLATIONS FROM ENGLISH INTO SERBIAN. pp. 185-201.

Szarota, P. (2010). The mystery of the European smile: A comparison based on individual photographs provided by internet users. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior, 34(4).

Understanding the American Character (February 1st, 2021)

What is the origin of their differences?

19th century French sociologist Alexis de Tocqueville’s observations of the American character identified its society by specific categories. He classified the average American as consumed with an idea of personal freedoms. The practice of finding reason within oneself rather than relying on tradition or the community separates Americans from Russians. Russian character development is more heavily influenced by religion (specifically Orthodox Christianity) and the upkeep of tradition in the community. Russia has a rich history, complemented by tradition and culture. America, a younger country, is constrained by fewer traditions. De Tocqueville took note of this, classifying the US as a place empty of institutions or traditions whether it be religion, family, or class. This ties back to American individualism.

Tyranny of the majority is also prominent in American society. Americans tend to consider themselves equal which results in a feeling of insignificance in the general community. This exacerbates their hunger for validation. Public opinion is greatly valued with specific focus on achievement and success to be openly displayed. This could explain why Americans are typically more extroverted and less selective with the people to which they are willing to entertain. Russian culture creates an element of secrecy between strangers and conversations rarely concern personal success, achievements, or future plans.

There is an unmistakable American optimism which stems from a Western focus on improvement and general positive outcomes. This can be noticed through simple everyday interactions among Americans where the social norm encourages us to smile often, compliment each other, and exude positivity. This creates a space where mental health transparency and psychiatry are centered. Russians remain more closed and circumspect about such things.

Understanding the Russian Character (February 14, 2021)

Let's recount Russian history. The country was dominated by autocratic rule to benefit the state at the expense of the individual. Meanwhile, America’s history is that of a new nation being settled by rugged individuals. It is fair to say that Russia endured a painful history with its leaders by comparison. Ruthless dictatorships instilled distinct fears into the Russian people that have been passed down through generations. An example is the obsession with secrecy and security that permeated Russia during the reign of Ivan the Terrible. This fear renewed in the Soviet Union under the rule of Lenin and Stalin. Their era of Soviet leadership restricted individual freedoms which fostered a community of vigilant people. The Soviet state security apparatus was famously heedful of any signs of change with the potential to undermine the institutions set in place. An attempt to innovate or resist risked punishment and forced Russians to conform to the beliefs and principles of society. In turn, these beliefs were ingrained into the Russian mindset.

A version of this suspicion still persists. Feelings of mistrust are conveyed through the stereotypical cold and unfriendly Russian demeanor. It is important to understand that Russian nature is inherently conservative, stemming from widespread Orthodox identity in the country. Religious conformity with the Russian Orthodox Church defined the pre-Soviet culture. It reemerged in post-Soviet Russia to play a central, stabilizing role both politically and culturally. With this religious conservatism comes a confidence in the Russian view of right and wrong and a foundation for the Russian attitude. Russians seem tough on the outside despite (generally) having a vast empathetic and selfless capacity at their core. The lengths a Russian will go for their trusted community is unmistakable. Themes of self-sacrifice and moral conscience are commonly seen in Russian literature and films. Take the renowned works of author Dostoyevsky or filmmaker Tarkovsky that remain in high regard to this day.

A large portion of populations in major cities like Moscow are people who are only three generations removed from peasant towns, myself included. Our grandparents have instilled their tough love into us. Our ancestors have left their imprint on modern social norms. In political systems such as tzarist and Soviet Russia, the interests of the state are placed ahead of the individual. This encouraged neighbors in a Russian Soviet community to vigilantly protect the state by reporting on each other’s transgressions, whether real or invented. Only family and close friends could be trusted while opening up to a stranger risked danger. Unlike the American emphasis on the self, Russians value their community above all. Russian patriotism and loyalty to the state is strongly felt.

Newfound Area of Common Cause

(April 25th, 2021)

While the newsflow describing the relationship between Putin and the new US president, Joe Biden, has reflected seemingly endless areas of disagreement and potential conflict, there is one area that has been quite encouraging. It seems Russia and the US are finding climate change to be an area of common cause.

On Earth Day, Joe Biden hosted a global climate change summit. Part of his motivation was to demonstrate America’s renewed commitment to this existential threat after the prior US administration had withdrawn from the 2015 Paris Accord, while another important part of his motivation was to create an avenue for diplomacy.

It worked. Vladimir Putin agreed to participate and even cited the need for “effective solutions” to climate change by developing new carbon capture technologies in the context of global cooperation. In his closing address, Biden responded to Russia directly with an olive branch saying, “President Putin and I have our disagreements, but he’s talking about how you capture carbon from space, it makes overwhelming sense.” And adding, “the United States looks forward to working with Russia.”

While some may dissect the climate change proposals themselves, I believe the importance of this diplomatic outreach deserves center stage. Given that the US and Russia have had a long history of unsteady relations, joining forces to fight a global threat of such importance opens an area where these two international superpowers can bond. Such an alliance would certainly be impactful. All throughout my life, I have felt the Russian-American relationship to be one of competition rather than mutual understanding. Seeing this headline makes me hopeful about future relations between these countries.

Gorky Park

July 5th, 2021

Yesterday, I spent time in Moscow’s famous Gorky Park. I’ve been to renowned parks like Hyde Park in London (the city where I was born) and Central Park in New York (the city where I reside) – but Gorky remains my favorite. Found in the heart of the city, alongside the Moscow River, it is hard to miss. With columns framing the magnificent stone entrance, Gorky Park is a segue from the busy city streets of Moscow into a paced environment. Through the gates is a range of attractions to suffice for a full day of exploration. Its wide spacing is untypical for parks found in America. Much of the allure of Gorky Park is in its vastness. It gracefully combines elements of nature with manmade structures. I am given the space to revel in tranquility and peace. Massive trees tower overhead, as if in secretive groves, leading visitors to venture out into a world of theme parks and screaming children. I can’t decide whether I prefer the calming feel of the magnificent groves or the fun-filled onslaught of all the attractions. Perhaps, the contrast between them magnifies the qualities of each and helps me to appreciate both.

Park Druhzby

July 16th, 2021

At the entrance, there is a statue of two figures releasing doves. It always caught my eye.

A few days ago, I revisited Park Druzhby. This beautiful Moscow park translates to “Friendship Park” in Russian. The park sits just outside the city center, alongside the Riverport transportation hub for the Moscow Canal. Here, the scenery is unlike that of Gorky Park’s. Park Druzhby is marked by the dramatic feel of tall trees towering above the narrow walking paths. Built in the late 1950s, it served as a symbol of unity and friendship with other nations. In fact, a World Youth Festival was held in Moscow in 1957, at the time of the park’s creation, and over 3,000 youth delegates planted a tree as to symbolize the unified parts. There are fewer attractions and more emphasis on perfecting a nature feel for visitors. It ignites a distinct feeling of calm, suited to a local park for morning walks rather than attracting tourists.

The type of visitor in Park Druzhby felt unlike what I see in New York. Central Park is a mix of runners and bikers and tourists. Of course, there are some New Yorkers, like myself, who visit in times of good weather and to break away from the concrete landscape. In Moscow, people rarely come to parks with the idea of exercise in mind. Rather, Moscow parks bring together cliques of people, of all different ages and relationships, to enjoy each other’s friendship in the Park of Friendship.

Vaccine Hesitancy

October 17th, 2021

This summer I spent six weeks in Moscow amid the pandemic. During this time, discussions about Covid vaccines were common. In public spaces, it seemed like everyone was keen on the topic. After returning home to New York, I made the same observation.

In Moscow, the Sputnik V vaccine is the only one offered. Western or Chinese vaccines are unavailable. For many Russians, there is a strong sense of national pride that they were the first country to develop a vaccine. When it comes time to take the vaccine, however, they are less interested in celebrating the victory. The vaccine rate is among the lowest in Europe at 31% despite having had a functioning and freely available vaccine available longer than most others.

In New York, the vaccination rate is much higher, but vaccine hesitancy is still a problem. The problem seems more innately political in the US than in Russia. People refusing the vaccine in the US sometimes disagree with the science, but most talk about ideals of freedom as they mistrust the motives of the current administration.

In Russia, on the other hand, most point to their suspicions of science while fewer openly talk about mistrust of the government. The most popular independent radio station, Echo Moscow, offers a parade of scientific ‘experts’ who happily promote all the various conspiracy theories about the vaccine. I heard my co-workers discussing it over the summer. This is also the radio station catering to the nation’s intelligentsia. Imagine that.

Both countries present anti-vax science, but in Russia, it is targeted at the educated elites while in the US it is targeted at the working class. And both countries see vaccine hesitancy as a form of showing mistrust of the government. The two countries appear different, but perhaps that is only on the surface.

A Call To Action

September 14th, 2021

A picture of me at Union Station, leaving D.C.

Last weekend, I was grateful to have had the opportunity to travel to our nation’s capital while visiting colleges. At a time of such national turmoil, I felt moved by the famous monuments and important government buildings around me that represent everything I’ve studied and learned since I was young. I thought about America’s problems and how I can proactively help address some of these challenges. The pandemic, for example, is a universal challenge having a widespread impact that touches us all socially, mentally, and physically while threatening to permanently alter the trajectory of our nation. The trip got me thinking about the things I might take for granted in the midst of the pandemic and how grateful I am to have the opportunities I do. I felt inspired to help.

As I spend time analyzing both sides of my cultural heritage as separate, I worry that I begin to lose sight of my holistic cultural identity. I need to embrace them both and derive the best from each and share my best efforts with each. This trip put me more squarely in touch with my American side with all the patriotic symbols surrounding me. For our country, the past few years have been a time of evolution and change in a new progressive era where I am proud to be a part. We have been advocating for issues, in hopes of addressing them, to improve the nation for future generations. I realized that societal change, and the trajectory of our nation, is essentially driven by young people like myself. It is incredibly important for the younger generations to advocate for change and set exemplary action for the future youth and, more importantly, to be a source of inspiration.

Conversations need to be had and the beauty in freedom of speech as Americans needs to be more appreciated. America sets the example for most other countries, such as Russia. The fates of both of my countries are essentially tied; the progressive measures taken in the US today can influence Russia at some point.